1. Prof: what are the leading indicators that the job market will be good when you pass out?
Student: It is a cyclical cycle [next b-plan cycle ki dukan]
** Class ROFL**
2. Prof: ** Discussing Corporate investments ** So it will be Cash Debit. Can anyone say what will be on the credit side?
Student: Sir, I think it will be Cash
Prof: ** Stumped ** How can I debit cash and credit cash too?? We are not talking about Satyam here !!
** Class ROFL **
3. Prof: ** Discussing about something and then giving examples **
Student : One such example is when we had this disease Chicken Hundi [and I thought it was a dish] ** He meant Chikungunya **
4. Prof: Give me one example of a business where Buyer has more info than Seller !
Student: ** violently gesturing with hands and blabbering **
Prof: ** picking on him ** You dont get ideas just because you go blah blah and simply keep moving your hands
** Class breaks out into laughter **
SoapBox
1. Candidate: This council is student body driven. It cant be a one-man army [at this point he saw President - Naari Swatantrata in the crowd frowning] .. it cant be one-women army too !
Day Zero: OIC director gets cracking
1. Student: My Quad is having a problem with my water heater
[OIC]: I think your quad should resolve its problem with Water heater amicably. Let them be mature & not get into fights.
2. Student: I have a problem with my leaking flush. What should I do?
[OIC]: Whatever you do, dont p*ss in the flush tank
3. Student: I have a rat in my living room.
[OIC]: Switch on the TV. Maybe it wants to watch "Ratatouille".
4. Student: What can I do about snakes?
[OIC]: For starters, Charm it.
5. Student: My AC is not working
[OIC]: I guess your AC is too lazy ! Align your incentives ! It'll work !
6. Student: I have a problem with my study table
[OIC]: Approach the Counselling Services. Only they can resolve personal problems.
7. Student: There is no food in my quad
[OIC]: Do you wanna pay for it or rent it ?
8. Student: My bathroom ceiling is leaking
[OIC]: Good. Now you can save water by not using the Shower nozzles !
